Saturday, January 24, 2009


Nearly three years ago I checked into this hotel room. It was summertime. I was going through something. I thought it was the most awful thing. My heart was broken. I had never felt that way in my entire young life. I was in a state of pain, confusion and sadness. My esteem was low. I didn’t know how, when or if I would recover.

I came here this weekend just because I felt I needed to get away from home for a while. I wanted to be in a different physical space. I wanted to sleep in a different bed. I was also hoping for some better sleep. Sleep doesn’t always come so easy to me.

While sitting here a few moments and flood of gratefulness fell upon me. I won’t say that I’m completely healed from 2006 but I can say with certainty that I am much better today than I was then when I checked in to this hotel. I am blessed by God to know that I am not yet the best I can be but that I am better than what and who I was 3 years ago, 3 months ago and probably even 3 days ago. I continue to reach new levels of understanding about myself and the world in which I live in and co-create.

And I do not pray for my metamorphosis to end, instead I pray for it to be completed.