Saturday, September 02, 2006

Mr. Nice Guy

Yesterday morning AQueer had some dental work done so I spent my evening with him as he tried to recuperate. He took codeine and I drank cocktails. We were a perfect pair. AQueer and I hadn’t had a slumber party in some time and I think it was just what the both of us needed. It had been a good but at times emotionally pulling week. As I sipped on a martini while we were watching MTV I saw a photo of Nelly that sent me into a Sex and the City stream of consciousness. Nelly spit the rhyme – what does it take to be number one? Two is not a winner and three no one remembers. Carrie Bradshaw once pondered the age old question – do nice guys finish last? All of this hip hop and heart got me to thinking about my most recent past.

To the Wiz, I gave my everything. I was a good friend, a good listener, a good everything you can imagine. In my best efforts to treat him differently than all the other men that had done him wrong, I allowed him to inevitably treat me the same way I vowed never to be treated by anyone else. I was the nice guy.

In relation to the Biz, I wanted to be his friend at the very least. I know he is coming out of a relationship right now. While I know there are some vultures that would fly down for the attack I’d resigned to sit back and be patient. He and I chatted the other night and he abruptly logged off. I sent him an email. It was most sincere. He opened and did not reply. He is out of the country on business so I can’t reach out to him via phone. Maybe I should have left well enough alone. But I think he is cool and after all, I’m nice.

Even crazier, while at my desk yesterday morning my cell phone rang and I had to blink several times and wipe my eyes to make sure I wasn’t seeing the screen with distorted vision. Fresh Rain was calling. He hasn’t called me in over a year. During our 2.5 hour conversation we caught up on each others lives. He even filled me in on the origins of his current relationship. I thought that he had gotten back with his ex. I was wrong. He is in fact in a relationship with a guy that he started really talking to around the same time he met me in the spring of last year. Get this. He said that he was digging me but the other guy was more aggressive. Silly me. I was trying to court. I was trying to move a bit slow because I knew he’d just gotten out of a relationship and said that he wasn’t really looking for one immediately. Nice me.

I could go on.

Fresh Rain asked me why I was single. He said he didn’t understand it. Later on in the day I talked to the Bayou2Boston and he asked the same question and said he didn’t understand this unexplained phenomena either. At least we are all on the same page. I think that I’ve come to a point in my life where at least once a week someone that I am asked if I am single and then looked at like I’ve told them that the Statue of Liberty has disappeared when I tell them I am. Maybe there is a guy out there who wants to be in a relationship with me and David Copperfield has pulled one of his tricks and has him hidden somewhere. That is far fetched but might be the answer I give to the next person that asks me. They will ask and I will say yes. Then they will ask why and I will say its part of a TV Special. It sounds more fun than my traditional, “I don’t know.”

But what I do know is that in my heart of hearts I still want to keep holding on to the belief that nice guys don’t finish last. Do they?